“Call?” He said. We looked at each other, wondering if this was the moment our relationship would change forever. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest as he dialled the number and held out the phone for me to take it from him. “I just don’t know,” I told him, shaking my head back and forth slowly.
Was this really what I wanted?
To be tied to someone else, when all I’ve ever wanted is freedom?
He sighed heavily and put down his phone before coming over to sit next to me on the bed. “What are you afraid of?” he asked softly, looking into my eyes with concern written across his face.” It’s not that easy,” I replied. “I’m not looking for a relationship. I just want sex.” He sighed again and looked out the window, but he didn’t say anything else to me before we went back to watching TV.
It was an awkward silence that neither of us wanted to break as we tried to come up with something new on Netflix instead. The phone never rang so it wasn’t until later when I got home from work that evening that I knew what had happened, Nothing.
The next day at lunch, my friend texted me asking if everything was alright because she noticed how quiet I had been all week and hadn’t heard back from me since last Friday night which seemed like such a long time ago already.